As we all know, the Dems won the house last night and may possibly take the senate. It is a dark day indeed for our nation. I don't know about the rest of you, but I was terrified to wake up this morning and leave my house. Even with the Dems in power for less then 12 hours, I fully expected to see terrorists and suicide bombers roaming the streets of St. George, looking for their next target. Gays and lesbians freely frolicking; painting the town in various shades of rainbow. Globs of stem cells that resemble humans selling their body parts on the black market, or should I now say "rainbow market." In fact, I dont know why I even decided to leave my house and go to work, because I knew fully well that when I got there, I would find that some Mexican had stolen my job.
Then, in flash of inspiration, it came to me. LET THE DEMOCRATS CREATE A CLONE ARMY. This brilliance came to me while I was watching Star Wars Episode II, Attack of the Clones, and thinking about the dems satanic desire to do more stem cell research. Now a lot of you may be thinking, "Wouldn't it be sinful to create a clone army?" Well we wouldn't be sinning, the dems would, and they are going to hell anyway. Its the same thing as when you ask your inactive brother to go buy you pizza on sunday. He's the one who is actully breaking the sabbath and sinning, but we all get to enjoy the delicous outcome.
Think about it...we would be able to bring all of our troops home, we could keep the clones there for as long as it takes to successfully inforce democrocy, and if they were captured by the insurgents and tortured, no one would really care. Well, I can't guarantee that no one would care, there would probably be some stupid liberal group out there crying for the rights of American Clones. Maybe we could look into creating Mexican Clones...well, mabye not, who would be affraid of a short skinny Mexican Clone? Unless, they looked like a gang member...well, we can work out the details later.
We can only pray that the Clones dont become self aware, such as the Cylons, SkyNet, or the Artificial Intelligence from the Matrix Movies.
ALL FEAR THE DEMOCRAT CLONE ARMY
11 comments:
Ah, Darth Spencer, a noble idea. But that kind of orignal thinking is the last thing this country needs. Why don't we just let "the decider" make the decisions here.
But anyway, wouldn't creating a clone army and withdrawing real soldiers be a sign of weakness? Wouldn't it signal that we have been wrong all this time? Wouldn't it mean that the thousands of Americans that have died (hundreds of thousands of Iraqis have also died, but they were probably terrorists anyway) died because of our mistake and our false pride? Wouldn't it be tantamount to admitting we were wrong (and, as we all know, admitting that we were wrong is a sign of weakness and will bring terrorist attacks upon us like blood in the ocean attracts vicious, deadly sharks)?
What's more, I'm afraid the only man with the vision and intestinal fortitude to pull off raising a clone army--Donald Rumsfeld--just stepped down. Thanks a lot, Dems.
You're right Ian. My plan does sound a lot like "Cut and Run." I guess it hasn't taken long for me to be influenced by the Dems huge propaganda machine. I still want to carry out my idea though. And knowing that anything that goes wrong can easily be blammed on the Dems brings me comfort. I'll have to ponder this. Who knew that strategic planning of this sort took so much thought?
Darth Spencer, I never realized how conservative you are. I always thought you were liberal...
If your next apprentice doesn't kill you, you'll have my vote for whatever race of power you are in.
Ah, Cblakes, you would make an excellent Sith Lord. I'll be keeping my eye on you.
Funny post Spence. Nice visual effects.
dude,
what the hell???
What do you mean by, "What the hell?"
did you mean like...
What the hell!!! Why didn't I think of this?
or
What the hell!!! Why has this still not happened?
or
What the hell!!! Why isn't Darth Spencer president of the USA?
Please elaborate
i mean what the hell i had no idea darth spencer thought this.
I am a happy democrat, had an abortion last week, when i got pregnant by accident by my stem cell recearching, rainbow loving, partner.
I believe we should send all of the republicans to iraq.
angel
Angel-
Thanks, but no thanks for trying to pass your fema-nazi agenda on my blog. I should censor you. I dont see how your plan to send all Republicans to Iraq would be better then sending a clone Nancy Pelosi army. If we sent all the Republicans, who would be left to love our country? Do you not realize that if all the patriots were gone, that the democrats would just start to burn up all the flags, which would actually increase global warming?
Don't you mean that burning all those flags might possibly start a little global warming? We all know that global warming is really a myth created by tree-hugging junk scientists who make it their business to make life hard on honest, hard-working oil companies.
Good point Ian. Do you remeber when Al Gore said that he invented the Internet? Sounds like he's made up this whole Global Warming thing as well.
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