Stardate 01-20-2009
Well, Readership, the count down to the end (2012) has begun. Today, Obama was sworn in as President; so starts the moral and economic downfall of our currently thriving nation. I'm proud to say that I saw this coming and blogged about it back in February of 2008. Computer Data tells me that others are concerned about this subject as well. According to Google Analytics, since October 27, 2008, 704 different people have looked at my post titled, "
2012: The End of the World." Here is some other data that I am proud of. In the days leading up to the election, Oct 27th- Nov 4th, 143 different people read this post and spent an average time of nearly 7 minutes on the page. I'm sure my impact on the election was huge, but not big enough. Since Nov 5th, the day after the election, 564 different people have logged on to my blog to try and understand how the world will soon end.
My friends, the end is inevitable. At this point we need to stop complaining and start acting. All that matters now is how we spend our time preparing for the end. That is what I would like to speak to you all about. Here is a list of what my female and I are doing to prepare for the end:
1. Build underground bunker (I started digging last Saturday)
2. Put together our food storage (My female has taken charge of this task)
3. Buy lots of guns and ammo (Bought my first gun last week before Obama makes it impossible to do so)
4. Learn self defense (I'm almost a master)
5. Pray that in 2012, Mitt will run again, win, ride into the white house on his white horse to save the constitution and the world from total destruction
As a third degree white belt in Gracie Jiu-Jitsu, I have decided that it is my job to teach you all how to defend yourselves. Over the next few months I have planned a series of posts that will teach you about a few of the self defense techniques that I have mastered. I've used many of these moves while growing up on the tough streets of the upper east side of Salt Lake City and I attest that they do work.
These techniques were taught to me by Master Mashiro and can all be found in his book, one of the greatest books of all time, Black Medicine: Volume II, Weapons At Hand. For each of my posts in this self defense series, I plan to share a few self defense techniques explained by Master Mahsiro. In addition, for those who don't have a concealed weapons permit or may not have your gun with you during the time of an attack, I will share some of Master Mashiro's ideas on everyday household items that you can turn into makeshift weapons in a matter of seconds.
Now, for the first series of techniques. Please pay attention and take very seriously the words of Master Mashiro. The following was taken from the chapter titled, "
Striking Points of the Arms and Hand."
"Fingernails: We are all familiar with the fact that fingernails can be used for scratching, an ineffective technique at best. They can also be used for clawing, however, which I more practical. In this context the nails can be used to achieve deep penetration into the eyes, throat and especially the nerve pressure points on the back of the hand. Some dedicated karate and kung-fu artists allow their nails to grow 1/4 to 1/2 inch long, and strengthen them with nail hardener. Naturally they also sandpaper the tips to a sharp edge. The wound produced by four of these nails slashed across a person's throat (like saw teeth) is difficult to believe even when seen." (I am already growing out my fingernails, as should you. I wonder how many throats Master Mashiro has seen slashed by fingernails)
"Tip of Thumb: The tip of the distal phalanx of the thumb, together with the sharp edge of the nail. The tip of the thumb is used for gouging, usually at the opponent's eyes but frequently involving the throat and other nerve pressure points. The trapezius muscle is especially vulnerable to a thumb gouge." Enjoy the picture.
"Thumb and Forefinger: Which of us does not know how to pinch with thumb and forefinger? This pinch can be very painful when applied in the lip or nose region, and can crush a testicle like a soft-boiled egg. When the pinch catches the thyroid cartilage in its grip it can actually be fatal." Enjoy the picture.
The following is taken from the chapter titled,
"Makeshift Weapons"
"Bar of Soap: Sooner or later your captors will give you a bar of soap, if only to be relieved of the smell of you. Slip the soap inside your sock (or wrap it in a towel) and use it as a blackjack. Strike for the temple, for the mastoid process behind the ear, or for the collarbone.""Shit: There is an old story about an oriental warrior who made a mess in his pants, let it slide down his pant leg, and then kicked it into the face of his enemy as a diversion. Just keep in mind the fact that if your place of confinement doesn't contain any dirt to throw in your kidnapper's face, you can always make some!"Darth Spencer's Tip of the Week: If your shit attack doesn't work, your captors will most likely give you some soap to clean your hands and legs. If they do give you some soap, now you know what to do with it.
Stay tuned for more excellent self-defense techniques.
